The Pros of being a Daughter

I never realized how lucky I am to be born a girl and not a boy till ... just about now.
Being a good daughter, you're never suppose to mouth off to your parents. I did it once when I was younger... and I got into a lot of trouble.

Today, I was preparing an activity that I was going to use for my summer camp kids. All night, my mom, as been "giving" her "suggestions" on how this activity should be done.... properly. I keep telling her I know... and explaining to her the reasons for doing why I was doing what I was doing. For example, I was telling my mom that I'm going to set up various stations... my mom "suggested" that I scrap the idea of stations, and just do everything all at once. I then proceed to tell my mom that I needed to prolong the activity, so it'll take up the rest of the afternoon. My mom shrugs and continues to question my other procedures.

"Why are you doing that?", "Why don't you do this?", "I don't understand this...", "Have you emailed XXX yet?"
On and on for over 2 hours... in response I would say things like... "please! just have a little faith in me!", "i know what i'm doing."

With my craft supplies covered hands, my mom makes one more request of me, "you know you should send that email to XXX now"... and on the inside.. i'm pissed as hell. Then my dad decides its the right time to ask me, "What on earth are you doing right now?" That, being the straw that breaks my back, caused me lash out with, "JUST LEAVE ME THE HELL ALONE! GOD!" and i storm down into our basement to clean up the messy tools i've just used. My mom, who thinks that she's got the best people skills chip in with a, "oh, your dad is just curious, why are you so sensitive."

And being the me, who's lost my cool, I yell back, "you've been on my ass all night. PLEASE HAVE A LITTLE FAITH IN ME!"

If I was a boy or if i was any younger, I'm sure I would have gotten an ass whopping. But seeing i'm on adult now... and i think my dad thinks i might be pms-ing... i got away with it.

I count that as a win any day

Holy Crap! I'm old O_o

I recently had a birthday. Didn't really do much... didn't plan much.. and to be honest, I had no intention of planning anything either...
But I did get some pretty awesome swag!!

It was a tardis themed day... maybe it's a sign... the Doctor is going to turn back time for me!

a tardis t-shirt, a tardis to play with, a tardis notebook! well the laptop wasn't really tardis themed.. but I pimped it out with a simple tardis wallpaper!

Letters I would never send #4

Hey you,

I was rereading your letter. I don't wanna go either. I wish life was more like how we want it to be.  I wish we got what we want, and what we want right now is the opposite of whats happening now. Life sucks load sometimes.

-Me

Moroccan adventures

To celebrate my birthday, my friend took me to a Moroccan restaurant.

Lamb tangine (?)

beef skewer

mint tea.. =.= lol, you have to drink that stuff

Traditional dessert... (half eaten, cause i forgot to take pictures lol)


And as a side... I have never seen this before... but apparently it goes great with lamb lol

I've had Jordanian food before, but not Northern Africa, so I was more than excited to try.
The restaurant was designed interestingly. The sitting area was like inside a tent... kinda dark, but really cool, and the food wasn't too bad.

coleslaw

Dear coleslaw,

I love you. Please don't ever leave me.

That is all

I was wrong....

How strange it is. Last night, I was still basking in the happiness of my glasses, and hanging with good friends. 24hrs later, I'm upset because, I was wrong about someone.

I thought that by now, I've grasped on how to judge people. And I was wrong.

In the past two weeks, I've finally be able to admit that Firstly, I can no longer trust one of my supposedly close friends, since she's been telling people the secrets which I share with her. Secondly, a person who I thought I could be good friends with, has changed, and today I received my slap-in-the-face reality check. Though I thought we could have been good friends, I eventually grew to dislike/hate her. I guess deep inside I was hoping she would go back and change back into the person that I thought I liked, and today I found out that, that was never going to happen. Ever.

I just feel that over the course of 2 weeks, the relationships that I had tried to built with other people, the people that I had opened up to, was gone. And there is no point in salvaging them. As much as I didn't like these people, I find myself very upset at whats happening. Partly due to, having built a social identity that I've wanted, taken away from me. And me also questioning why I can't seem to keep a relationship. Because it's happening to me so many times, it can't be other people's fault (though I might try telling myself that), but could it be my fault? Am I not able to keep a nice long relationship with people because there's something socially wrong with me?

I think I'm upset because I thought I knew people better, but I was wrong.

I wear my sunglasses @ night

I've been wearing glasses since I was in grade 6, and since gr 8, I've been wishing I could wear sunglasses.
I've tried various clip-ons, but I didn't like them.
Then 2 weeks ago, my parents suggested that I get "custom" (OR! prescription) sunglasses, since I've been bothering them about giving me contacts, so I can wear proper sunglasses.
When I hear this I got super excited. I had to wait another week, so my sister could help me pick a set of frames, and then one more week before I could get them.
By the time I got this today, it was nearing evening and there was a lack of sun. BUT it didn't stop me!
I've been wearing them basically all day, when I can lol.

Here's hoping for good sunny weather tmr!
  

my new shades baby!

Silver lining

Despite all the negativity I've been feeling lately, I found my silver lining today :).
Today I met up with two of my good friends.
These friends have a special place in my heart. I don't see them often, so it's always fun to catch up and see what they're up to. In addition, unlike most of the people I was seeing on a daily basis this year, they studied linguistics with me. So, in a way, they're my "linguistic" friends.

It was refreshing talking to a different group of people. We spent about three hours talking about how our linguistic background has effect our lives with a remembrance of the people in the classes we didn't like, and then it went to talking about various cute butts, to who was cute or not.

It was such a refreshing change. A day where I didn't have to deal with the usual boring topics, ie: anything to deal with archaeology, other classmates, *eye roll*

In general, we all liked the change. I find myself missing them loads. Since my undergraduate degree was a double major. I was able to have a two group of friends who had different topics of interest (thank god!) and different views on life. Strangely, it was the linguistic group that I preferred to hang with most of the time. 

I just have to remember, to keep looking for that silver lining!

Ramblings pt3

I really hate talking to you sometimes.

Every single time, you judge neon how I dress, what I buy, what I have, where I put things, my weight, my body figure!
I always feel like crap.

Its like you have nothing good to say to be ever! Why can't you give me compliments?

You make me feel so incompetent sometimes, and I know I'm not.

I'm starting to wonder if my low self-esteem is partly factored by you.

Letters I Would Never Send #3

Hey You,

You... *shakes head*. You confuse me. I'm still mad at you. I mean you did hurt my feelings. Yet, you- you, are one of the few people I can talk to at this time.
What am I going to do about our relationship. What am I going to do?
I am in need of new, better friends.

-Me

Letters I would never send #2

Dear past me,

You are really dumb, you know that. After you learn a lesson once, you'd think you'd remember what happened. But no, your "faith" in "people" always makes you screw up. Dont you know that your emotions are the only ones being hurt cause you get disappointed. You feel betrayed, we know! Learn from it dumbass! I can't believe we're still having this convo. And it's only going to be a matter of time before we do this again. Sigh

From,
Now me

Dessert

Ever heard if buyer's remorse?
I have cheesecake remorse.
Should not have finished the rest of that cake. It was so good, but I regret it after the last bite.
Till next time... Tmr... Ice cream!

----
Page count: book 1:page 500

Sansa

My first reactions to her:

*eye roll* shes really dumb

*eyes widening* what is she thinking?!?

*eyes tearing up* nooooo

Now: poor sansa... You're one of my faves now :D

Sunny times

We've been blessed with wonderful weather at home recently.
Today's adventure included sitting in the sun for a couple of hours. Though I don't so anything except sit there, I ended up feeling really tired. Even hours later.

So what I'm trying to say is, warm weather makes me sleepy. Anyone else?

modern greeting cards

Happy memories....

I know it's been more that 20 years,since we've had a date or two.
But I'm lonely and drunk, and it's 4 am.
So I'm Facebook creeping you.
~~~~~

Daring to dream...

You know that we all hate you, and we know that you can't win.
So stop trying to stuff your suitcase into the overhead bin
~~~~

Life changes
You use to be a ball of laughs, your parties a riot.
but you've gotten kinda preachy, since you're on that vegan diet.
---
heard it on the radio... couldn't stop laughing

a look into the past

I was recently digging around my room, and came across some... "artifacts"

In late 2006, I was in my last year of high school and looking at what to after.
I had a lot of stress, with a failing course, and, never having failed anything before, thought my life was coming to an end. (it's so silly, i know)

To cope with my stress, I started to write letters to "my future self". Don't worry, there's not much interesting, mostly me ranting about how crappy I thought my life was hell... etc.

Looking back on these letters I can't seem to think how silly I was. I also think of the timing of the discovery of these letters. In my previous posts, I mention about me making decisions and the stresses which I'm putting on myself. The difficulty which I talk about in my letters, also talk about me making decisions of what to do after high school.

I'm going to treat this as a sign.... My problems now aren't really anything. I'm going to look back on this in a couple of years and just shake my head. Another pro which has come up is reviving my letter writing. I can't believe I've stopped, it really helped in releasing my stress. and I've decided to continue writing them... this time to other people, and not myself.

some days....

Ramblings Pt 2

I love my family.
I never go against my family when other people are involved.
For you to think that I might, disappoints me greatly.
Do you not trust me?

--
Page count book one: page 418

Letters I would never send #1

Dear you,

I don't want to hate you. I really did like you when I first met you. I really thought we could be good friends. But the more I get to know you, the more you piss me off.

I'm sick and tired of you using your break up as an excuse and prior to that you using your ex. An excuse for what, you might ask. Your excuse for the way you act, you excuse for why you are what you are. I personally hate, HATE, people who pretend to be someone they're not. Sooner or later I will find out and I won't like it. It's happened before an it's happening now. If you were honest with what type of a person you are to start with, I think I would be less harsh with you now, mind you, we might not be friends, but at least I knew what I was getting myself into. Don't get me wrong, I don't consider myself as a person who has the perfect friends. I have friends who are douche bags. And yet I'm willing to deal with them, cause I knew they were asshole since the beginning. But now, with you... I feel betrayed, lied to, and anger.

When you were sad, I felt bad for you. I really want to help you feel better, but by then we were already drifting apart.I don't know exactly when it started, but I have a rough idea on when it really took off.

Its gotten to a point where anything that comes out of your mouth, strikes a nerve. I also can't believe some of the situations you put me through. Some might say it's your honest/blunt personality. Whatever it might be, it's not for me.

It's not your fault. I'm starting to see you for who you are. And... you're not a person who I want to be friends with/ the friend you want me to be (we might still be associates, but nothing more). Don't ever change, because people obviously like you. I guess I'm the one who's changing/ a douche bag/ not knowing what she wants.

I wish you the best.

-me

Geek-a-fied

I had the opportunity to watch the TSO preform an awesome set of pop music.

The theme was sic-fi!
After all my years of playing music from star wars, I've finally had the chance to listen to pros preform the piece. And it was beautiful!

They played a variety of music including a tv show medley, star trek music, a hint of superman, the classical 2001 odyssey and more!

Best part.... George takei was there too! And a personal fave a member of the 501 legion was there! Picture was taken! Lol

If I died today I would be a happy geek.
Best 14 dollars ever!

-----
Page count: 400